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My Photography has it's Roots in the Blues. (Recollections of a Grinch from Xmas Past)

24-November-2009

 

For a long time I hated Xmas. Hate is probably the wrong word, but I wasn’t part of the merriment. It was an association thing. When I was eighteen my eldest sister, up and died without warning two days before Christmas, … the third calamity in two and a half years to visit our previously sunny family.
One can only ever talk for oneself, for me it was the end of certainty. Security was replaced by angst, … something always felt wrong. After a while that feeling morphed into thinking something was wrong with me.
These two photographs taken when I was thirty summed my relationship with the season of greetings. 
 
 
 
A few things have happened since. Simone, my life partner explained to me soon after we meet that yes I was indeed mad, but so was, without exception everyone else. This is an observable truth I now hold to be absolute.
Also the end of certainty that once confined me when I was my world, is now a freedom when thinking of everything else.
Plus I also recognise that my experiences aren’t unique and nor am I.
To top it all off, having a five-year old around is a total game changer. I’m not having a bleat; I actually enjoy this time of year now, but never expect anyone to feel the same way.


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Thursday, November 26, 2009 2:59 PM
This is a beautifully profound and poignant story to share - thank you. The images reflect your relationship with the season and your words added to the picture make both the text and the image sing their sad song.
I'm glad you enjoy Christmas now, and you remind me that it's not a happy time for everybody. Often the opposite. I love that first picture of that lonely tree out there in the cold - is that you?
# sh
Thursday, November 26, 2009 5:40 PM
Thanks Lizzy, it's hard for me to read them too literally but looking back they seem isolated and lifeless. I suppose the tree could have been me because it blooms when winter is over, just like people if you know what I mean.

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